shmexxy:

1. Money can’t buy happiness but

somehow, it’s more comfortable to cry in a BMW than on a bicycle…

2. Forgive your enemy, but

remember the motherfucker’s name.

3. Help a man when he is trouble & he will remember you

when he is in trouble again.

4. Many people are alive only because

it’s illegal to shoot them.

5. Alcohol does not solve any problem, but then,

neither does milk.

(via betsyyrawr)